There are a few reasons why... I have been jumping much smaller and though I'm fine with that, but it just doesn't feel inspiring or worthy to document in micro detail. The other reason, I hate the way I look right now, I'm just not as strong and fit as I used to be, which I am working on.
After my fall at the end of August, it's safe to say my confidence jumping has been very shaky. One of the biggest problems I had was I didn't feel secure in the saddle like I used to pre baby when I was very fit and strong. So step 1. get fitter and stronger.
I have been struggling with fitting extra exercise in but I had a brainwave and my dads exercise bike came to live at our house. Every nap time I'm on the bike and then I do pilates. I'm noticing a big difference, 10 weeks into this regime.
Step 2 was to jump little and often. I am someone that if I don't do it regularly I get in my head and make it worse. So little and often it was, which was REALLY hard. I was so, so nervous, even the tiniest jumps felt impossible. But I wanted to so I just kept plodding.
I went to the last few comps of the season and did low rounds and had success. I ended the season on a positive note with good memories, rather than ending on a fall and a broken bone.
Step 3, get Henry in front of my leg. He's not been forward or had much impulsion for a while, and I haven't really addressed it. So I started addressing that gaping training hole. It's improving all the time, and he's getting fitter and stronger.
Step 4 was to have lessons. And tonight I had a brilliant lesson. We jumped a grid, I felt strong and secure and the jumps were starting to get back up to where we were before. Jumping through the grid was perfect, I just had to focus on my position and the quality of the canter and let the jumps happen. So I didn't worry about how high, just the process, and the jumps happened by themselves. And each jump was pretty great. We met them well, had a good canter pretty much the whole time and my position was so much more solid.